So the universe walked into the classroom yesterday and via the day's assigned translation reminded me it is very important that someone step up and be an ordained buddhist, that the universe is listening, does see things on all our levels and is responsive, often has a sense of humor too, and wishes I would continue to be an ordained buddhist for many reasons.
Do you believe that? or is it easier and more likely that I am delusional?
I mean literally, I was giving serious thought (again) to dropping this nonsense, to giving up this forced intention, to finding refuge somewhere that feels better, when suddenly and unexpectedly the page before me and the professor before the class says be a boddhisattva, you can do it and it is needed.
And then I was asked to tell the class what a bodhisattva is.While I was marveling that the universe would speak clearly and directly into the mike, I had to answer this question without dillydallying. I later forgave myself for the puny answer I squeaked out and accepted the truth that this culture wants simple sentences, "a straight answer" to complex questions. I am not going to tell you what I said, that would be anticlimactic, but what would you say? and then again does it matter? I think if one can conceive of a fullness of the concept of Boddhisattva then one steps into it. I think this is the nature of 'empowerments' of crossing any threshold in daily life, of the nature of human life. When we grasp the tail of the dragon we are lifted and pulled and carried away.
And then how does one find support for a determined existence when it is not nourishing? just ask. The nature of the universe of reality is responsive and alive. She is conscious and active and just waiting to be asked. I asked and wham! there was the reply like the handwriting of a ghost. Very funny, Buddha, very funny grandmother...it's like the old tv show of the dead sea captain and the lighthouse keeper, no one could see him but her. Some people would lock a person up for talking like that, but others could see more deeply and realize it takes poetry and humor and creativity to talk about the experiences that don't fit the daily grind.