“In the end, it’s not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away” – Shing Xiong

Monday, June 29, 2015

Freedom of expression

Saw two beautiful young women walking up the street holding hands obviously infatuated, and obviously new to the freedom of expression available to them - feels really good in this place/time. I believe that the work to be done when in a heaven realm is to nurture it, to strengthen it, to water and to grow with it. All the good that comes our way must be acknowledged, appreciated and enjoyed with gratitude and love. We have the opportunity to expand and ripple outward into other realms like sunlight cresting over a hill. Who wants to live without work, without meaning? This is our responsibility, to dwell in happiness and root that compassion, generosity and wisdom that develops within.

Saturday, June 20, 2015


reminded by a state of blissful contentment today that deportment should come from within, born of generosity, compassion and discernment - the three roots of happiness. This practice is a repetitive one, as practice implies. Over and over we return to understandings, touching them like loved ones - ah, this is truth, ah this is aliveness, ah this is kindness, ah this is happiness, ah this is forgiveness, ah this is compassion. A deportment born from discipline, from rigidity lacks that flowing quality of being. What a lucky nunk am I to have escaped that path, a wildflower, a feral spirit, scenting the morning air. Will this stand me in good stead when faced with grave challenges as discipline would? Who can say what the future may bring? Hoping for the best and planning for the worst I store away treasures of delight to recall in other times.

Friday, June 12, 2015

that old joke

someone told that old joke again yesterday - the "make me one with everything" hot dog joke. remember that one? Well, what if we could step up to a vendor's cart or truck and say: "I'd like to be one with everything." Or step out of the office and get a quick dose of compassion or courage or clarity, how about getting a glass of loving-kindness, a whiff of happiness, a bite of joy, a dose of humor? Why not? Do you really think that would be immoral? I think it would be wise and amazing and really really cool.

Now I would think it immoral if someone chose to purchase a cup of cruelness, or a toke of vanity, or a bag of anger. I think it would be stupid, but should they have that right? Would it be patronizing them to say that's illegal? Would we legislate that only over the age of *blank* can you purchase an emotion that could lead to harm of self or others?

In reality if we consider our past manufacturing/advertising and GREED the substances above would likely not provide the equal of true feeling and would likely result in blocked or altered sensation of our true potential, but if not, if it were possible to stimulate our own ability to feel (and it is, this is within our abilities as sentient beings) then we have in our hands such a wonderful world right? The only thing keeping us from it is attachment to "our desires." Rigid adherence to a set of "shoulds" is all that prevents us from choosing a pleasant outlook, an enjoyable feeling.

Stories of freed or enlightened beings sometimes describe them as mischievous, playful, unpredictable and highly amused. Having dropped attachment they choose what feelings they want to experience and alter them at will. This takes a lot of energy, a practice that cultivates and conserves and manages life to provide energy for being wise and will full is a full time occupation, but it pays well.

Sunday, June 7, 2015

Great lines

one of the best is:
"I am one of those people that think that there is more going on that we don't understand than there is that we do."
Hey, I said it before I heard it, and have heard it over and over again from more and more people and think it more and more often. It is the best and wisest thing I can imagine, that we really have no idea what is really going on. I can live there, I do live there.

Friday, June 5, 2015


Abraham Hicks or their speaker said in one talk she likes to walk around her garden and tell the various plants "You are my favorite." A professor here at Emperor's - Dr Joseph Yang once said to another student and I "you are my favorites." I like to tell Hiro and Sensei they are my favorites, it is just an awesome phrase that generates enormous well being in all parties and the ripple effect is wonderful. When having to choose a supervisor in clinic I thought back to that comment from Dr Yang and really felt warmed by it. We were taught in childhood not to have favorites, because it means discrimination, unkindness but I have never found it that way - everyone and all things can be our favorites. Having a favorite does not exclude others it includes them by warming the heart. When I hear someone else say something else is their favorite I feel benevolent toward that thing or person too.

If there is any chance someone or thing will feel left out then extend the sensation to include others. I go around thinking you are my favorite this and you are my favorite that - it is such a fun thing to think. It opens the heart chakra and warms the channels, tonifies the qi and nourishes blood like sunshine. Being in the moment is the key to inclusion and with enough practice anyone can understand that this never excludes others. Our attention can only hold one thing at a time however swiftly so we move from favorite to favorite without diminishing the feeling or authenticity. It's a lot of fun to do.

If you want to get technical this is a Brahma Vihara Practice, metta karuna mudita upekha - loving kindness, compassion, joy with others, and equanimity are the measureless spaces, the brahma viharas that we explore in the jhannas. The benevolence of the saying connects to mudita, the joy with others and in combination with momentary mindfulness it sets us free from comparing and contrasting rather than locking us up in them.

The semantics problem is not a problem if you embrace it. Here the word favorite implies contrast on a mundane level but is all embracing on a spiritual level. That's my opinion today anyway.

Thursday, June 4, 2015


  • v.
    To hold oneself back; forbear: refrained from swearing.
  • v.
    Archaic To restrain or hold back; curb.
  • n.
    A phrase, verse, or group of verses repeated at intervals throughout a song or poem, especially at the end of each stanza.

    this is the third definition - and the refrain is: mean people are suffering - suffering is misery, unhappiness, pain. I have been reminding myself that when someone is mean it means they are suffering. "Misery loves company." Those who are suffering cannot see the pain they create, and cannot care, they are consumed with their own suffering, if they were happy they would see others and appreciate and enjoy the world around them.

    Often just acknowledging any emotion will dissipate its effect on the body mind, but those who are suffering are least likely to acknowledge that. The suffering takes hold and becomes a vicious circle.

    When we can disengage from our hurt we can generate compassion for ourselves and others and relieve their suffering thru forgiveness and understanding. We can stop the wheel from spinning. And why not? Clinging to suffering to pursue justice is just stupid. Clinging to suffering to seek out compassion and understanding is almost as bad. If the need for compassion and understanding is present then give them, they do not have to come from others.

    Do not tell the story, just let go and get on with life. It is best to realize that those we care about most are also the most likely to bring about our suffering - if we choose to have that happen. We can choose to acknowledge pain and let it go. We may have to do that over and over again, but that takes no more effort so why not?

    It sucks to hurt so let it go. You may be letting go of a perceived relationship but that was a fallacy of perception, nothing real, a construct of your habits, your conditioned mind, nothing more - the pain you feel and fear is absolutely one hundred percent founded on delusion. So let it go. And then return to happiness and openness and take up vulnerability again because that is the essence of flexibility, that is our true nature - movement and flexibility.